Vote Stephens in 2016, 35 of 40

So, there is a nice piece of serendipity (Scott Rees) that this blog is number 35 in this Lenten series. Today is my birthday, my 35th birthday to be exact. I am not sure how many of you have this piece of knowledge floating around in your brain matter but I am now eligible to run for President. To that end I am announcing my write-in candidacy for President in 2016.

I do not make this announcement flippantly (except that I do). I have been in serious thought (nope) and prayer (not once) about this decision for years (or just a day or two). I do have a passion for politics (I have even lost a few Facebook friends over politics, and by lost I mean I unfriended them) and have some strong views on a multitude of subjects. Among them the color of M & M's, I prefer Blue.

I am sure that many of you may not agree with me politically, but I am hoping that I can pimp our friendship for your votes. And if that doesn't work by itself I am not against giving each person a sub-cabinet position that does not require Congressional approval. If neither of those are possible I am willing to consider releasing you of your tax obligation for the duration of my presidency, perhaps longer if you are willing to blow up an oncoming asteroid the size of Texas.

I see myself as a cross between Harrison Ford in the movie Air Force One and Martin Sheen in the West Wing. Sheen politically and Ford action hero wise. And while we are on the subject while I have learned that there is not an escape pod on the plane, I would implement an upgrade.

I believe in the Constitution and Bill of Rights, by and large, and would gladly defend the parts of them that I agree with and do my best to change the parts I do not.

As President I would put an end to welcoming the champions of various athletic competitions unless I really liked the team, and would be willing to ban the Cowboys and Jets from participating in the NFL.

As President I would also allow a random sampling of Americans who agree with me to spend one night in the Lincoln Bedroom or at Camp David, winners choice.

To end, I am asking for you vote, for your support, and for your money, because unlike every other person who runs for the office, I am by no means wealthy, and since I am a Pacifist I don't even own a war chest.

Thank you for your consideration.

Peace and Love,
Pastor K